Hot chocolate. Colbie Caillat. Snow falling gently, blanketing the ground in april.

Wait - WHAT??

That's right, folks. It's the end of April and it looks like Christmas outside right now. Fluffy white snow is blanketing the ground, and I feel like I should probably be hanging Christmas lights right now instead of staring wistfully at the new skirt my mom and I picked out the other day that I'm supposed to wear for senior breakfast next month. Which leaves me with sort of a strange feeling in the pit of my stomach. I've never been big on endings, and even though I'm looking forward to college and all, I feel a little strange with the idea of leaving this all behind.

I understand that college isn't as big a change as it's sometimes made out to be. Everyone comes back home soon enough, and whatever friendships stick will stick, and whatever doesn't just wasn't really meant to be anyway. But I wonder at myself a little bit right now. Do I really like it here so much, or do I just like it more now that I know I'm leaving soon? And I also wonder (with the benefit of hindsight being 20/20 and all) who I would be today and how I would be different without a past so full of random trials that I sometimes wonder if there's a hex on me (ok, that's overly dramatic but you get the point). I wish there was an alternate dimension where I could see who I would be with a different past, and then choose which life want. How cool would that be?

The snow puts me in a pensive mood I guess. I'll try for something lighter next time.